The Stone the Builder Refused: Rejection and Redemption

Guest Post By: Diana Renee Williams

“Rejection does not mean you are not good enough, it means the other person failed to notice what you have to offer.” –Mark Amend

“Oh, the holiness of always being the injured party.” — Maya Angelou

Rejection… who hasn’t felt the burning sting?

Rejection is not a pleasant experience for anyone. Whether rejection comes as a social snub, unrequited love or getting passed over for a writing assignment, rejection deals a direct blow to our ego.

The psychological aftermath of rejection causes emotional wounds and, if left unhealed, can fester internally as shame, anxiety or embarrassment.

Rejection also has serious implications for society as a whole as often times individuals who are ostracized become angry, aggressive and violent. Think Ferguson, MO.

The pain of rejection is real.

New research in psychology and neuroscience suggests that the same brain pathways that are activated when people experience physical pain are also activated when they experience the emotional pain of rejection.

According to Naomi Eisenberger, PhD, at the University of California, “As far as your brain is concerned, a broken heart is not so different from a broken arm.

Those reports were backed by a MRI study, which found that people who had taken Tylenol (acetaminophen) daily for three weeks had less activity in the pain-related brain regions when rejected.”

So how do we heal the brokenness of the rejected soul?

Quite possibly by looking at those individuals who healed their pain and became successful despite experiencing rejection.

Throughout history many innovative leaders have been rejected.

The clever and original ideas of Maya Angelou rejected. The profound philosophies of Aristotle… rejected. The harmonic compositions of Johann Sebastian Bach… rejected. The peaceful efforts of Nelson Mandela… rejected. The message of love sang by John Lennon… rejected. The Truth spoken by Bob Marley… rejected.

And of course who could forget Jesus of Nazareth who lamented, “A prophet has no honor in his own hometown.”

Not quite the faces that readily come to mind when you think of a “reject.”

Surprisingly, not only did they experience the trauma of social rejection while following their dreams but during their childhood toxic messages of rejection lingered in the air as each would be abandoned, orphaned or adopted during their childhood.

It is almost as if The Great Architect of the Universe laid down a blueprint for their life that sent them to Earth with the ultimate crash course in rejection.

Ouch! What a seemingly sadistic plot! Or was it the greatest act of mercy and love story ever written?

When faced with this trauma, these men demonstrated the amazing fact that the human mind and spirit have a Divine capacity for recovery and growth.

Each one of these people decidedly took on the mindset that life did not happen to them but for them.They made the decision to tap in to their innermost resources and connect with the gift of rejection by channeling the genius, creativity and divinity inside.

They stood in the glory of their full potential despite their circumstances.

They kept the purity of heart to connect with others and share their voice and message with the world despite being given the cold shoulder. They did the opposite of what was done to them and they connected with others and with themselves.

While sharing their gifts they found redemption. With their own hands their wounds were healed. They removed the label of reject that was placed upon them and replaced it with the truth that was inscribed on their hearts.

Instead, they stood in the light of the truth that they were worthy and rose to connect with their calling.

Sometimes rejection can seem like a big “no” but it can oftentimes be the greatest “yes”. Sometimes rejection can be the ultimate act of love and mercy that the Universe can bestow upon you so that you can dig deep and keep building your masterpiece.

We all have unique talents and gifts that are waiting on the inside to be released and sometimes we are given a “no” so that we can keep working.

So, next time you get that dreadful rejection letter or get blown off by that love interest remember, keep building baby, you are a builder!

About the Author

image2 Diana Renee Williams is an accomplished freelance writer and lifestyle blogger currently living in Augusta, GA. Ms. Williams offers her writing as a service to others to help increase positive self-development and strengthen individuals and communities. She has immersed herself in the company of many luminous and progressive thinkers to include Mastin Kipp, founder of thedailylove.com and is a contributor for the sexy savvy self-help blog, addictivedaughter.com. Ms. Williams is currently accepting assignments for The Augusta Chronicle, one of the oldest newspapers in the United States still in publication. Prior to freelancing, Ms. Williams worked as a social worker and domestic relations mediator thereby broadening her perspective on a wide range of topics.